Skip to main content

Christmas and Manners…Happening or not?

Christmas Tree for 2011 (photo the author)

Recently I read an interesting article quoting a  psychology professor at the University of California, Riverside (Sonja Lyubomirsky).  It stated that "Academics have long theorised that expressions of thanks promote health and happiness and give optimism and energy.  Now, the study of gratitude has become a surprisingly burgeoning field and research indicates being thankful might help people feel better.  However, there is a catch:  you have to say thanks more than once a year..."

After a week in which I encountered rude airline passengers and staff I thought about this concept.  Why is it that people having the opportunity  to "fly", which was so seldom offered to people 30 years ago, and even then when it was it was a "luxury", believe it is appropriate to be rude to each other?  How lucky are they compared to those for whom travel is merely a dream?

So many of us will be travelling over the Festive Season and given that Christmas is, I believe, a time for reflection on the place of ourselves in families and wider communities, why don't we just take time to say "thank you", or "merci' or the thousands of other words with the same meaning, to those who assist us and to those whom we love?

It is after all a phrase which we teach our children, in all cultures, as the basis of good manners.   But come Christmas time, people are so "busy" and "stressed" trying to achieve their goals of gift choices, food choices and more that the spirit of a kind word, a gentle  touch and a genuine word are lost....with the spirit of Christmas.

Please smile at the person who assists you at the airport, in the plane, the bus, the train; and the shop assistant at the counter; and smile at the family member who helps you with the Christmas wrapping and food preparation.... and above all,  for those of us fortunate enough to have people with whom we can share the Christmas spirit, be grateful...and say thank you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Boyfriend, Manfriend, Partner, Companion…a new word required….

Dance "partners" (microsoft) I read a really interesting article the other day written by a Generation Y male lamenting that his girlfriend no longer referred to him as her “boyfriend”, but in an overheard conversation as her “partner”.  He took exception to this expression writing: “I must have missed the memo on my sexless new categorisation – I would certainly not have approved it.  A ‘partner’ is someone you twirl around at a barn dance”. (Andy Jones, Grazia magazine) I have had a business partner;  there are partners in law, stockbroking and accounting firms. And so to refer to my personal life-sharer as a partner was not comfortable for me. But despite the fact that the English language is alive and evolving, there is not a word or an expression to reflect the status of one’s “life companion” whether in a gay or straight relationship if not committed to, or already married. The word “companion” actually applies in both French and Italian. Although in Engl

Bali…Bogans, Tattoos and the Ugly Australian…

Balinese temple (photo LP 2010) I have returned in the past few days from a holiday in Bali, Indonesia, with my sister.  Unlike my trip in 2010 when I stayed more remotely in the north west at Pemuteran  and  the north east at Amed, this visit was to a five star resort in Legian. What a difference!  The streets of Legian were very busy, the locals almost outnumbered by the Australian tourists.  I heard very few languages other than “Aussie” spoken and it reminded me that when I travelled with my French boyfriend to the northern part of Bali, I was told by the Europeans I met that they tended to avoid the tourist hubs of Kuta, Legian and Seminyak because of the loud, rude and crude Australians…yes a generalisation about the Aussies, but unfortunately, as I was to learn, a correct one. A friendly local trying to sell us a toy (photo LP 2012) It is difficult to write this post without appearing a “snob”.  But having canvassed my ideas with friends, acquaintances, col

Friendships...gold and silver...real and virtual...priceless!

My 21st birthday dinner...Oh so formal then! I was talking with a friend the other day about friendship.  About how it impacts on our lives, from childhood and teenage friends, to becoming friends with boyfriends’s friends, husband’s friends and their wives, parents of other school children, social club friends,  friends after divorce or death of a partner, passing friendships, acquaintances…and now virtual friends. It’s complicated. And I am finding in my “middle” years that my need for friends has reduced…not that I don’t value and cherish my friends, but my actual need has lessened.  Why, I wonder?  I used always be a “People who need People” (with apologies to whoever wrote the song made famous in  Funny Girl ) sort of a person.  I was always out and about, making sure that I saw my friends, knew all that was going on with them and theirs.  Afternoon tea for the girls...with bubbles! However, as the years have moved on, my children have become independent